Thanks Tehran Times

PARIS (Agencies) – An Air France plane with 228 passengers on board has gone missing, and the families of the passengers, in response to this sad news, can only hope that their loved ones find a fate similar to the passengers on the plane of the U.S. TV series “The Lost”, who survived and were stranded on an unknown island, where they struggled to stay alive.

It's ridiculous (and offensive) that the headline has already declared "French plane crashes with 228 aboard" without that actually being confirmed anywhere else in the news world, but then to talk about fucking Lost in the lead paragraph? Now That's Infotainment.

E! online also knows how to look on the bright side:

Twitterverses: Celebs Saddened, Nervous About Missing Air France Plane

Today 12:42 PM PDT by Breanne L. Heldman

Like you, Hollywood is holding its breath waiting for news of the missing Air France flight from Rio de Janeiro to Paris.

Some, like Stephanie Pratt, are terrorism theorists: "I really dont think its the result of a lightning strike...Why is my gut thinking it was a terrorist act," she says.

Most, however, are saddened or just plain scared.

"I can't believe what I just read about the Air France plane that's missing," Samantha Ronson writes. "So sad and frightening. my heart goes out to all affected."

Mark Hoppus from Blink-182 says basically the same thing. "Just read the news. Terrible. My thoughts and prayers to everyone involved in the Air France flight loss."

"Say a prayer for Air France Flight 447," Emmy Rossum orders.

Thankfully, Elizabeth Banks, Michael Urie and Denise Richards are in sunnier moods.

• Elizabeth Banks had a good time in hell at the movies this weekend. "Saw Drag Me to Hell this weekend. So much fun. I giggled thru the gross parts like a baby boy."

• Michael Urie is proud of his Ugly Betty costar. "Congrats to my girl Becki Newton, she won a Glamour UK award, commiedienne of the year!"

• Happy birthday to Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen's kiddo! "My daughter Lola turns 4 today," the proud mama writes.

• Soulja Boy, we're not sure you want us to answer your question… "Has anyone of my followers use to not like me and then woke up one day and said 'Hey.. I think i like Soulja Boy'.?"

• Tweet Topic: What's up with this June gloom people are whining about in California? Brooke Burke is complaining, as is Emmy Rossum. East Coasters, start your comment engines!

The National in Abu Dhabi, UAE is now reporting "'No hope' for lost airline passengers" in their headline. The "No hope" quote is actually pulled from No Where. Unless you count their own paraphrasing: "The French president, Nicolas Sarkozy, and French aviation sources conceded that there was no hope of finding survivors." Quoting yourself has got to be a party foul in international journalism, no?

Just so it doesn't look like I'm only picking on Middle Easterners and Americans, the UK's Times Online also claims "No hope for 228 passengers..." in their headline. They soften their outlook in the first sentence of the article though: "There is virtually no hope for the 228 people on board a packed Air France jet which went missing over the Atlantic Ocean today, the worst disaster in the airline's history." The article was written by two French correspondents. Maybe those were the "French aviation sources" that The National was citing?

Ok, I think I finally found the source of "No hope." The Telegraph in the UK had the headline "Air France plane lost: officials say 'no hope' of finding airliner." Reported by two correspondents in Sao Paolo, Brazil, their lead is "Officials said they had 'no hope' for Air France Flight 447 which dropped off the radar three hours and less than 200 miles into a flight from Rio de Janeiro to Paris." I am still not satisfied with this "No hope" claim. In subsequent paragraphs, the article quotes "Air France," "sources," and "authorities," but I'm still not seeing a sentence anywhere that has the phrase "No hope" attributed to a human being nor is it linked to a longer sentence. Unless there was a press conference and someone asked "What have you got?" and the spokeperson said "No hope" then I think this reporting is no bueno.

The RoBeast vs. Wikipedia: Round Two

All of the Wikipedia vandalism descibed in my last entry was reverted overnight. The person who edited them back was kind enough to call it "cute" and didn't ban my IP address. Of course, I wasn't satisfied with my vandalism lasting less than 24 hours, so like any gambling addict would, I didn't quit while I was ahead.

I first hit up the Megan's Law page:

Not as cute, I suppose. It was reverted within seconds. As was this:


I (or should I say, my anonymous IP address) received another warning, but still haven't been banned or anything. I have discovered that there are people patrolling these Wikipedia pages with anti-vandalism tools that catch shit within seconds of an edit. I suppose I can either stop vandalizing pages, find less popular pages, or teach the world to get a sense of humor.

Let's see if The Used's fans can handle another benign attack...


I don't know what it is that I find so hilarious about Wikipedia vandalism besides my obvious problem with authority and penchant for smartassedness. I don't laugh too hard at most stand-up and am typically unimpressed by the average comedy film. I like to think that my sense of humor is a little dark and sophisticated. But on Wikipedia, the most simple, lowest common denominator-style vulgarity or non-sequitur makes me laugh my ass off.

For instance, someone made an edit to the Stemshorn page that made me chortle. There's really nothing to the page (which I guess is what made it a target), other than a map and some text:

Stemshorn is a municipality in the district of Diepholz, in Lower Saxony, Germany.

Someone changed this to:

Stemshorn is a municipality in the district of Diepholz, in Lower Saxony, Brazil.

It was reverted. He was warned. A week later the same user changed it to this:

Stemshorn is a fucking awesome species of reindeer located district of Diepholz, in Lower Saxony, Germany.

The second edit really got me going. It may be the tenacity of the vandal that excites me. I can identify with that underdog mentality. The person knows that it's going to be reverted again, but just can't resist doing again, and even one-upped himself (or herself). It's not just the attitude, but the context that's funny. It's such a serious, boring page, that any little piece of flair shines. The word "fucking" blatantly undermines the "Quiet! in the Library" attitude and puts a smile to my face (not so much with Panic! at the Disco though). The word "reindeer" is pretty silly too. And, I don't know... this person may be telling the truth. Maybe the Stemshorn is a species of reindeer. And maybe it is fucking awesome! I don't know, but I think that your average 5th grader knows not to quote Wikipedia for their fucking report on Germany, so there. Victim-less crime.

Like I said last time, it's all for the lulz, so I won't spend too much arguing on the moral implications of internet vandalism. I'm also going to keep doing it as long as I can do it humorously. My Q*Bert McCracken was reverted after 50 minutes and I the Erff is still alive and kickin'.

The Stemshorn vandal received a 31(?)-hour suspension from editing pages on Wikipedia.