Patt Minefield in the Morning

That was going to be the name of the parody Matt Pinfield show I wanted to make while he was on hiatus. We all see how good I am at following through on my ideas though. Speaking of setting myself up for failure, my June Year's Day Resolution is to blog every single day all month. We're doing all right so far.

Let's get back to Matt Pinfield and WRXP and most importantly, how it affects ME! First, a little history. I discovered WRXP about a year ago via a giant billboard while driving through New York City. With my MP3 player not functioning, I was listening to a lot of radio on my commute to and from work, and I was pleased to have Matt Pinfield and Chris Booker entertain me. One day, KROCK turned into a Top 40 station and Matt swooped in like a C.H.U.D.. WRXP stood up and commanded the reigns of NYC rock. My mp3 player was working again, but who cared? Even though I'm not the biggest indie rock fan, it felt awesome to support Matt and the station every morning.

AND THEN.... Matt went to rehab. He was missing a lot of shifts so everyone knew something was up. He announced that May 1st would be his last day for a while. I listened to the station for another week, then I had to pack it in. I am not a fan of his co-host Leslie Fram. I'm sure she's a nice person, but as a radio personality, I can't handle it. Everything about her delivery is too professional and polished. Usually, those qualities would be seen as compliments, but I prefer rough around the edges. I never saw the chemistry between her and Matt Pinfield, whose rambling anecdotes exponentially digressed as he got more passionate about music and current events until Leslie killed everything with the time and temperature. Any time she says something that approaches personal, it seems like a rehearsed note written in the margin of her morning playlist. Like I said, I'm sure she's a nice person and a good program director, but I just could not listen to her every morning without Pinfield's relief.

On afternoon drives, I had a similar problem. WRXP picked up Nik Carter after KROCK changed formats and fired their staff. I wasn't crazy about him when he was over there, and I still didn't like him much at RXP. I catch him talking over the ends of songs all the time. I fucking hate that.

So I stopped listening to the station. The music just wasn't as good to me without Matt Pinfield telling me how much he liked it. If you think I sound like a douchebag for saying that, then wait until you read the next sentence. I started listening to Top 40. A lot of it. I found myself excited whenever I heard the first second of "Poker Face"* for the third time in a day while driving to home base (that was a Pulitzer Prize winning sentence, by the way). The days of looking at Top 40 charts and saying "Who? ft. Who???" were gone. Sure, most of the songs are garbage. Everything these days is a ProTools loop exercise set to a bass drum metronome competing for the catchiest lowest common denominator hook. I think Pitbull's "Calle Ocho" has achieved that honor. There are things I still refuse to sit through (All-American Rejects), but for the most part, when I'm not trying to come up with Weird Al parody versions of these songs,* I am morbidly fascinated by the prevailing trends in today's popular music. Autotune. Shameless lyrical sampling. Ridiculously basic keyboard lines. Interchangeable electropop. Generic love balladry. Birthday sex. I am passed the point of getting angry at this music. I can act like it's beneath me, but it's still bigger than me. When I listen to it, I think a lot. Not just about the production, or the lyrics, but about history, the future, humanity, the music industry, technology, the economy... I want to know who is buying this and why. Do they care about the music? The lyrics? Do they just want to dance? Do they know who created the music? Do they know what the references mean? Will they listen to it 6 months from now? Will they look back in ten years and think it was silly? Will their kids laugh at them? What will their kids listen to? What will they name their kids? Will.i.am? Who will survive and what will become of them? Why does it get my attention but not my money (OK, Kelly Clarkson* got my money).

I had been meaning to write this blog entry weeks ago, when Matt Pinfield's future was still unknown. I decided to finally put the words down because Matt came back to the station today. I listened to the show for a while. It was mostly Elvis Costello songs and clips from an interview with him taped last night. Matt Pinfield sounded a little out of it (dare I say slurry?), but was still asking his trademark leading questions. Elvis Costello was talking about his new album which was recorded in just 3 days, unusual for a rock record. "We listen to records for a half-hour, forty-five minutes... why shouldn't they be recorded in a half-hour, forty-five minutes?" I always complain that pop songs sound like they were written recorded in less time than song lasts and copy-pasted to fill up the rest of the track. I guess I'm mostly curious as to what it is that the divides timeless from disposable. Is it a guitar? An experience? A confession? I didn't come up with the answer, but I got tired of listening to Elvis Costello and put on Kelly Clarkson's "My Wife Would Fuck a Horseshoe" instead.

* Coming up in June: Lady Gaga, Kelly Clarkson, the end of Virgin Megastore, Top 40 Parodies, The Google Interrogation Game, Evil corporations, Speeding Tickets, Pink Floyd, and a lot more if I'm going to blog 30 times this month.

FUCKING K-ROCK

THEY CHANGED FORMATS AGAIN!!!!!!!!

I was listening to the radio on Monday morning and noticed that Opie and Anthony were gone--a step in the right direction, in my opinion. Instead of those tools, they were playing rock blocks. I was hoping they were just keeping the morning slot warm for Booker, who just moved back to the station two months ago. I should have read the newspapers, because my theory was very wrong.

On the way home from work today, I stopped at Party City (the coolest place in the world). When I went in, there was rock music playing. When I returned to my car, it was fucking Eminem coming out of my speakers. I checked to see if accidentally put Z100 on, but I was wrong again. At 5pm today, the rock was over. 92.3 "NOW" is currently playing Top 40. Apparently they are playing 10,000 songs in a row with no commercials. There don't appear to be any jocks either. WTFUCK?

Speaking of the destruction of New York City, I spotted what was obviously a C.H.U.D. attack in the Village a couple weeks ago:

Ok, well, it may have been the Wolfen. The DNA samples haven't come back from the lab yet. Either way, I'd rather be attacked by an Urban Monster than be subjected to another fucking Top 40 station.

Fortunately, Matt Pinfield is here to save us:

Hey everyone- it's Matt!

NYC just lost another rock station…the legendary K-Rock. We are sad that many people have lost jobs and that the New York rock scene just lost an outlet. We play a lot of the music that K-Rock embraced, so we would appreciate your support if K-Rock was previously your preferred station.


And, to our faithful listeners, we appreciate your help in spreading the word about 101.
9 RXP-The New York Rock Experience! Maybe you can convert some old K-Rock listeners!

We thank you deeply for your support and welcome your feedback!

Click here to read more www. 1019rxp. com/rockisalive
and email us feedback at rockisalive@1019rxp.com

Keep Rockin!
Matt Pinfield

Now that I think about it, I've seen Matt Pinfield tear up dumpster bins with his bare hands in the past. Maybe this is all part of his master plan to scare us into the hands of Alternative Radio. I'm on to you, Pinfield. I'm on to you.

Finally, The Rock has come back to New York?

On the way back from Providence this weekend, I saw a billboard announcing a brand new rock radio station in New York City. I've been bitching for years and years about how boring this radio market has been and how ashamed it should be for it's lack of competition. This is one of the largest markets in the whole god damned universe, and it only has 1 current rock station, 1 classic rock station, and 1 oldies station. And they just keep playing the same shit over and over driving millions of New Yorkers to their portable media storage devices.

The radio used to be a cool place to discover new music, but now it's just the place to go when you want to make sure you can still hear Sublime or Linkin Park every single hour. Or if you're in Philly, you can hear Pearl Jam every 5 minutes. But at least Philly has two rock stations. And so does Boston (at least it did when I was last paying attention in the early '00's).

Finally, someone has heard my cry and fired everyone at CD 101.9 (the smooth jazz station) and started restocking with some people that know a thing or two about rock. It's apparently been around since February, but no one told me until this past weekend. I've been glued to it in the car ever since. (All right, I was until I bought all those new CD's yesterday--sue me). The station is called WRXP--the Rock Experience--and has a ton of variety and not a lot of talking. A quick scan of public opinion on the internet and I see some complain it is too much variety to sound like a cohesive station. Sure, after years of a stalwart like KRock (WXRK)'s formula, I can see that if Audioslave doesn't follow Rage Against the Machine, someone's going to get suspicious.
So tonight I've decided to run a little experiment and see if this RXP is going to give KRock a run for its money (and hopefully, a kick in its ass). I will be monitoring all three stations at once, but only truely listening to one at a time. When I song I like or am interested in comes on, that station gets points for the duration of the track, and first crack at the next set of points. I may be aware that another good song is on another station, but I'm not going to switch unless I'm bored with the current one. Since RXP throws in a lot of classic alternative, I've decided to add the classic rock station Q104.3 (WAXQ) to the fray. 104.3 plays a lot of what's considered modern classic nowadays anyway, so I won't be surprised if all three of these stations end up playing "Smells Like Teen Spirit" or "Under the Bridge" simultaneously.

8:00 PM
WAXQ - Some shit by Led Zeppelin
WRXP - "People are People" - Depeche Mode
WXRK - "Fell on Black Days" - Soundgarden
Easy one. I will never tire of that song.

8:06 PM
WAXQ - Still Led Zzzzzzzzz
WRXP - Talkset... "Salute Your Solution" - The Rancoteurs
WXRK - "Paralyzer" - Finger 11
Though I'm not exactly a Rancoteurs fan, I tend to not trust anything relatively new that KRock plays.

8:10 PM
WAXQ - "Misty Mountain Hop" - Fucking Led Zeppelin Again
WRXP - "Runnin' With the Devil" - Van Halen
WXRK - "Janie's Got a Gun" - Aerosmith
Ok, either it's a Led Zeppelin block, or 104.3 does this every night, which sort of throws my results off.

8:13 PM
WAXQ - Still getting the Led out.
WRXP - "Get Off This" - Cracker
WXRK - Still Aerosmith
RXP actually just let that Cracker completely fade out without interruption by a douchebag DJ. Whether it's out of inexperience, or out of respect, I am extremely impressed by this.

8:18 PM
WAXQ - Commercials
WRXP - "Need You Tonight" - INXS
WXRK - Talkset... Commercials
I am very active radio listener, and I refuse to stop for commercials. I will not hesitate to keep switching until I hear music (and sometimes that includes jingles).

8:21 PM
WAXQ - "Beast of Burden" - The Rolling Stones
WRXP - Commercials
WXRK - Commercials

8:24 PM
WAXQ - Still The Rolling Stones
WRXP - Commercials
WXRK - "One" - U2
I can really only stand about 3 minutes of The Rolling Stones.

8:30 PM
WAXQ - "Bad to the Bone" - George Thorogood
WRXP - "Don't Look Back" - Boston
WXRK - "Rise Above This" - SeetherIn all honesty, this is the point where I would have completely shut the radio off, but I'll give George a shot in hopes that the song is almost over. Plus I think The Destroyers is one of the coolest band names ever.

8:31 PM
WAXQ - Still Thorogood
WRXP - "Don't Look Back" - Boston
WXRK - "Rise Above This" - Seether
I realize Georgie is only on his 15th solo and flip away.

8:33 PM
WAXQ - "Casey Jones" - Grateful Dead
WRXP - still Boston
WXRK - "Everlong" - Foo Fighters
Can't stand any more Boston either.

8:37 PM
WAXQ - "Casey Jones" - Grateful Dead
WRXP - "Slave to Love" - Bryan Ferry
WXRK - "All My Love" - Led Zeppelin
Ok, I admit I'm a pussy. I like this Led Zeppelin song. And I even sit through the keyboard solo. And the bridge. And the key change...

8:42 PM
WAXQ - "Freewill" - Rush
WRXP - "Runaway Train" - Soul Asylum
WXRK - "One" - Metallica
If I were in my car, I'd be playing fierce air drums.

8:50 PM
WAXQ - "Touch Me" - The Doors
WRXP - "One Tree Hill" - U2
WXRK - Commercials
Woozy from all the rocking out, The KRock guy easily tricked me with a short talkset that went immediately into a commercial, but I quickly recovered in time for one of my favorite Doors songs.

8:53 PM
WAXQ - "Don't You" - Simple Minds
WRXP - "Strawberry Fields Forever" - The Beatles
WXRK - Commercials
This was a case where I probably do like The Beatles song better, but saw no reason to switch off Simple Minds.

8:57 PM
WAXQ - "Layla" - Derek & The Dominos (I prefer the second half)
WRXP - No idea what is on. A lot of fucking noise.
WXRK - "When I Come Around" - Green Day
I may be tired of Green Day being on the radio, but I prefer the long coda of "Layla" to the fast first half.

9:00 PM
WAXQ - Still "Layla"
WRXP - "Laid" - James
WXRK - "Interstate Love Song" - Stone Temple Pilots
"Layla" still wasn't at the good part.

9:03 PM
WAXQ - "Losing My Religion" - REM
WRXP - "Gasoline" - Sheryl Crow
WXRK - "Runnin' With the Devil" - Van Halen
Sorry, just heard "Runnin' With the Tent Poles" an hour ago on RXP.

9:08 PM
WAXQ - "Long Cool Woman" - Hollies
WRXP - "Starman" - David Bowie
WXRK -"Discipline" - Nine Inch Nails
Another moment when I would have just shut this production down. I flip until something good comes on. Therefore, no winners.

9:11 PM
WAXQ - "Jump" - Van Halen
WRXP - "Starman" - David Bowie
WXRK - "Dude (Looks Like a Lady)" - Aerosmith

9:15 PM
WAXQ - Talkset... Commercials
WRXP - "Dig In" - Lenny Kravitz
WXRK - Talkset... Commercials
I'd rather listen to Carol Miller's smoky talkset than this Schwenker douche on KRock. I would also rather eat my own shit than listen to Lenny Kravitz on purpose.

9:16 PM
WAXQ - Commercials
WRXP - "You Got Lucky" - Tom Petty
WXRK - Commercials
Another near silent fadeout. Unheard of.

9:19 PM
WAXQ - "Bron-y-aur Stomp" - Led Zeppelin
WRXP - "Man-sized Wreath" - REM
WXRK - Commecials
Eh, new REM. A very weird track. A lot of dissonance in some parts, but a lot of nice harmonies in others. And short enough to listen to the whole thing.

9:22 PM
WAXQ - "Brain Damage/Eclipse" - Pink Floyd
WRXP - "Basket Case" - Green Day
WXRK - "On A Plain" - Nirvana
It's cute when KRock pulls out what it thinks is a Deep Cut. I really can't get enough of "On A Plain" though.

9:25 PM
WAXQ - Hour 3 of "Brain Damage/Eclipse" - Pink Floyd
WRXP - "How Many More Times" - Led Zeppelin
WXRK - "Beds are Burning" - Midnight Oil
How is KRock is winning this contest?

9:30 PM
WAXQ - "Locomotive Breath" - Jethro Tull
WRXP - "How Many More Times" - Led Zeppelin
WXRK - "Life is Beautiful" - Sixx A.M.
I start picking my nose and hope Led Zep is almost over. Please end soon. Please. Please. Oh my god. Who could possibly sit through a Led Zeppelin concert without assassinating Jimmy Page?

9:33 PM
WAXQ - "Time Of Your Life" - Green Day
WRXP - "Somebody Told Me" - The Killers
WXRK - "Iron Man" - Black Sabbath
Oh hell no. I didn't just sit through three minutes of Led Zeppelin live to hear the fucking Killers? I wish The Destroyers would fight The Killers to death.

9:39 PM
WAXQ - "Jailbreak" - Thin Lizzy
WRXP - "Message of Love" - The Pretenders
WXRK - "Self Esteem" - The Offspring
Unfortunately, just catching the end of the Pretenders' tune... which they again let fully fade out!

9:40 PM
WAXQ - "Rock and Roll All Nite" - Kiss
WRXP - "Dani California" - Red Hot Chili Peppers
WXRK - "Self Esteem" - The Offspring
I can handle "Rock and Roll All Nite" only for as many choruses as it takes for a different station to put a better song on.

9:44 PM
WAXQ - Talkset... Commercials
WRXP - "Dani California" - Red Hot Chili Peppers
WXRK - Talkset... Commercials
Nothing better came on, but oooh, 75 degrees tomorrow!
9:46 PM
WAXQ - "Night of a Thousand Stars" Phil Lesh and Friends
WRXP - "Closer to Free" - Bodeans
WXRK - Commercials
Where do I know this song? Is this a TV Theme song? (Ok, I had to look it up.) It's fucking Party of Five.

9:49 PM
WAXQ - Commercials
WRXP - "Foxey Lady" - Jimi Hendrix
WAXQ - "Night of a Thousand Stars" Phil Lesh and Friends
If I didn't have the Internet in front of me for this experiment, I would have spent the next two hours not listening to radio and instead still trying to figure out where I knew that Bodeans song from.

9:50 PM
WAXQ - "Have You Ever Seen the Rain?" - Creedence Clearwater Revival
WRXP - "Foxey Lady" - Jimi Hendrix
WXRK - "Learn to Fly" - Foo Fighters
"Foxey Lady" is one Jimi Hendrix song that I am totally sick of hearing.

9:54 PM
WAXQ - "Time of the Season" - The Zombies
WRXP - Commercials
WXRK - "Patience" - Guns N' Roses
Whenever I hear "Patience" or "Civil War" or "Knockin' On Heaven's Door" I immediately jump off the train.

9:57 PM
WAXQ - "Going to California" - Led Zeppelin
WRXP - "Time To Pretend" - Mgmt
WXRK - "Patience" - Guns N' Roses
Ok, Ok! There are like 3 or 4 Led Zeppelin songs I like. There are another 3 maybe that I can stand on a good day. This is one that I can stand. Plus, Mgmt are from Brooklyn and therefore, too hip for me.

10:00 PM
DONE

In my very unscientific survey, I've discovered that KRock has really got a hold on me. Still. In two hours of programming, I listened to KRock for nearly an hour (53), and both Q104 (31) and RXP (34) for just over a half hour each. The number of different songs I listened to each station is remarkably close, but the ones on KRock were often in the 5- to 6- (and in the case of Metallica, 8-) minute range while the other stations were most frequently only 3 minutes. When it comes to talksets, I'm personally biased against the KRock jocks and will almost always automatically change. The folks over at RXP are not terribly energetic or big-voiced, but at least they sound like they care about what they're playing. The DJ's on 104.3 are typically trustworthy sounding adults, and therefore, I believe them when they tell me the weather report.

Again, this survey was extremely unscientific. First, it was apparently 104.3's time to bombard us with copious amounts of Led Zeppelin, of which I am not a fan. Granted, all the stations played Led Zeppelin, but certainly not with the ferocity of 104.3. Second, I listened to the three stations online for convenience sake, so they may not have been operating with the same realtime delay. A few seconds here or there could have made a huge difference in my selections. Also, I limited my pool to only three different stations operating out of NYC and competing in an overlapping format, but in practice, I expand my choices to include a Commercial-Free College Metal station, an Oldies station, a top 40 piece of crap (that yes, I still find myself occasionally listening to) and a smaller AAA station that's located a little further west. The time of day, my mood, what I've already listened to today... all these things factor into my station flipping habits, and believe me, I'm a really impatient member of the radio audience. When my mp3 is working (which it is not), I don't even put on the radio for a second. I've even regressed back to the barbaric use of Compact Discs just to avoid today's commercial radio market.

Regardless of how inapplicable my fact-finding mission has been to the rest of the world, it can not be argued that more competition means more choices and more music. Ok, maybe it just means more fucking Led Zeppelin per hour. Either way, I hope the new kid on the block forces these other lazy stations to get off their asses and stop sucking up to 14 and 54 year old boys.