Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! Season CINCO Promo Contest Entry, Long Title!

I took a one day break from the RPM Challenge to whip up a video for the Tim & Eric Awesome Show Season 5 promo contest. I have ideas for a couple more, but I don't know if I'll have time to piece any together. Windows Movie Maker is not the most versatile program, but it's the only one I've got. Regardless of its limitations, I like what I came up with. Here it is.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQ-9Y-YXt9o

RPM Day 6 - A Man Exploding

I'm going to call this one "A Man Exploding" because I came up with a few lyrics for the verses and that was one of them. This video will look a little sloppy because I pieced some of the sections together after recording. I just wasn't sure how I wanted them to fit, but I think I like this composition. By the time I got to the final chorus, I forgot how to play it, so it's slightly different than the first two. Oh, and because it's the weekend, I'm wearing glasses. It's a new rule. Here you go:

http://www.youtube.com/v/OpFvzLeJXn4

RPM Challenge Day 5 - In It To Win It, and by It, I Mean...

Riffy Doodles and a Helmet Rip Off?

http://www.youtube.com/v/25DIbP94dD8

RPM Day 4 - Into the Wild/Into the Light

Day 4 video - http://www.youtube.com/v/khre1EU8wLo



Day 4 special bonus video - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LB41I0SoTMI

Stick it to the Mailman

I had band practice last night so I didn't have too much time to work on solo riffinating. I did come up with a few parts to play around with, but I worry that one may be too close to a Deftones song. I'm not going to bother uploading it until I flesh it out more tonight.

No major progress to speak of from Day 2, so what else will we talk about? How about what I think will shape and inspire my RPM process. I've always loved the first Foo Fighters record because Dave Grohl wrote and played all the parts on the album himself. If I had the time and resources to recreate that situation, I would love to attempt something like that. I'm not such an amazing drummer or bass player, but there's something about DI-Completely-Y that appeals to me. Maybe it shows my narcissism and a difficulty in giving up creative control, but I enjoy working independently on material, and knowing that the album was one person's vision and execution enhances the experience for me. I love the riffs and the songs, and despite the variety in the tracks, there is a still a unifying sound and consistency.

I've also been influenced heavily by Dave Grohl's lyrical style on this album (to be honest, I can't say the same for the Foo's subsequent albums). The sounds and rhythms of the words are more important than the story it doesn't tell. Take these lines from "Watershed..."

I stick it to the mailman
I'm pinned against a pot plant
I'm sick of all the sun-tan
Oily with the ray-ban

I'm skinny as a spit pan
Dealing with the shit plan
Playing with my bad hand
Just another rock band

I don't know what the song means, and I don't think I ever really cared, but I enjoy that each line recalls the previous in terms of rhythm and rhyme. I've never been much of a vocal person so I tend to mimic that kind of playful abstraction. I come up with a line and then sort of reinterpret it in order to write other lines. I end up with a lot of internal rhymes and alliteration, even if the phrases don't necessarily make sense. For instance, the other day I had the phrase "stick it in the mac n' cheese" in my head (for reasons I won't divulge here). Repeating that over and over again, it morphed into a bunch of other lines. With a little bit of coaxing, research, and immaturity, I ended up with this mess:

Stick it in the mac n' cheese
Fuckerfaster Appleseed
Johnny keep it quiet please
Jackin' off to van der Steen  
Jessica inspired the
Splattered Hewlett Packard screen
Watch out for the hackers' scheme
Back it up with McAfee

Yeah, it's impersonal nonsense, but I'm not trying to rewrite "Imagine" (though now that I really analyze it, I sound like I'm trying to rewrite "Watershed"). To me, lyrics are riffs too. You fuck around with them and make them noisy and sloppy where they need to be. Maybe as an experiment, I'll try to write a pretty one this month. We'll see.

First Day, First Song?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HTBc9tEDFF8

Playing in front of the computer screen gives me Avatar face apparently. I recorded the guitar portion of the video at a different resolution which I will probably not do from now on. Overall, I'm surprisingly happy with the track despite it only taking about an hour or so to come up with. Here's to hoping all the songs are this easy.

It might not stay at this tempo, and it might not be this mellow in the future, but like I said, it's "a decent framework" (do I have to use quotation marks if I'm quoting myself?). There are a few weird time changes, a few weird chords, but a pretty standard structure. That's sort of a typical Robeast Rollie song, so maybe I need to get a little more experimental for the next 9 songs.

Speaking of me, I told you that I'd tell you about the tale of my "band" name. Catarrh Clothesline is an anagram of my full name. It wasn't the funniest or the most offensive, but it's simple, alliterative, and a little gross. I'm a fan of it. Here were some other of my favorites:

The Saccharine TrollHitler's Anal CrochetElectoral Shit RanchStale Hernial CrotchLeather Lion ScratchInhale Scrotal RetchThe Last Coil RancherTallest Chino ArcherOther Anarchist CellOrchestra in Cat HellAntarctic Hell HorseEarth, Narcotics, HellRear Technical SlothThe Clitoral RanchesThe Citronella CrashRichest Carnal HotelHostile Rectal RanchRectal Chain HolsterEthical Rectal HornsRetinal Scratch HoleAlien's Leather CrotchTorch Each InstallerSectarian Hell TorchHer Lethal NarcoticsThe Tall Heroic NarcsHello Erratic SnatchRectal Crash HotlineAnthill Earth SoccerClean the Shit CorralLeech Scar TriathlonHarlots' Chanticleer  Some of those are pretty awesome, but I prefer the simple, two word anagram. Catarrh is mucus caused by an inflammation of mucous membranes, so a Clothesline of it makes for a fun visual. I have a stuffy nose most of the time, so it fits. And Catarrh is pronounced like Guitar, so that's another plus. Catarrh Hero has been used before, unfortunately. Oh well.

I've got regular band practice tonight, so I don't know if I'll have time to come up with any new riffs. See you tomorrow, maybe.

The RPM Challenge - Day 1

Today, February 1, 2010, the first day of the shortest month of the most controversially pronounced year of my life (I'm sticking with Twenty Ten, haters), signals the beginning of Record Production Month. Similar to November's NaNoWriMo, The RPM Challenge seeks to jumpstart artistic creativity by having participants to write, record, and share 10 songs or 35 minutes of original music by the end of February. I signed up for it this year and will be documenting my progress and problems here, posting audio on The RPM Challenge website, and may post some video on them there YouTubes.

Since this is my first time attempting this challenge and I'm not really sure how to approach it, I have no idea what's going to happen in these 28 days. We're encouraged not to use any prerecorded material or even start writing until February, so I'm going into it with my riffs and ideas formatted from my brain. In fact, I seem to have even sabotaged my writing process further by losing my mp3 player which I'd normally rely on as my sketch pad for songs and lyrics. I guess I'll be going back to pen and paper for a while until I can find the right replacement player on eBay.

So what tools do I have? I have an electric guitar and amp at the practice space, a crappy acoustic guitar at my apartment, and a good acoustic/electric guitar at the RoBeastress' apartment. I've got ProTools, but no laptop to run it on so I'll be relying on my cold, unfriendly digital 8-track for recording. I've also got some rinky dink keyboards and a decent drum machine to round things out. Maybe when no one is looking at the practice space, I'll sneak some real bass or drums into the mix.

It feels like I'm light years away from the point of even starting to put things down on tape (or hard disk), but no matter how I slice it, I've only got 28 days left to finish this. If that's not enough of time constraint, I'm also busy prepping 10 songs for a March recording session with my band Plowing Mud Forever. I am committing myself to this Challenge though, so if I have to go back to the days of Mountain Dew fueled all-nighters and headphone hair, then that's what it will take. I think the key is going to be to always have an instrument or an inspiration nearby. That sounds wise enough to embolden, huh?

Always have an instrument or an inspiration nearby.

I'm also going to try to stop complaining so much. There's just not enough to time in February to whine. Tonight I'm going to go home and dick around on my crappy acoustic and see what I can come up with. Whatever it is, it will probably be out of tune, but at least it's a start. Those don't count as complaints, do they? If anyone is interested in following me on the RPM site or linking up or whatever sociomusical networking is to be done there, my "band" name is Catarrh Clothesline (long story, I'll tell you tomorrow).

By the way, another great thing to do tonight would be to fill out Mark Prindle's 2010 "Top 7-3" Reader Survey. The deadline is midnight tonight!

Two Thousand Zen: A Tribute to My Missing MP3 Player

Two Thousand Zen: A Tribute to My Missing MP3 Player

Zebra Dalmatian

Zebra Dalmatian

Conan & Artoo

Conan & Artoo

Charlie Brown's MetroCard

Charlie Brown's MetroCard

Snapple changes labels again?

I don't even know which is the newer label anymore. Based on my last Snapple label blog entry, I think it's the one on the right. Personally, I find the on the right more has more zazz. It's not as fun looking as the old, old one--

--but I like that the Fruit Punch related color is at the top, so the liquid appears to flow into the label as opposed to smashing into it abruptly (what the fuck am I talking about?). Old Snapple pushed fun and quirky, so the label looked like Carmen Miranda's head exploding, but if you're pushing "natural" and shit like that, it's important to have the smooth feng shui instead. I haven't really been obsessively paying attention to Snapple for a while now (we discontinued Snapple in our vending machines, and I've since switched to Vitamin Water hardcore), so I don't know how long ago this switch happened, or if it's been across the flavor boards, but I think they're on the right track. In my opinion, they should slap the color on the bottom too, but what do I know?

Actually, looking at both of them again, I like that the one on the left has more yellow better than the overpowering with green on the right. It could be my poor camera, but I think the yellow makes the Snapple logo pop better. Green is for vegetables, not fruit. Will I ever be satsified?

Vanilla Punk Rock

Vanilla Punk Rock

Xmas Pubes

Xmas Pubes

Volcano of Ecto-Cooler

Volcano of Ecto-Cooler

Left Thumb Subway (This Sucks)

Left Thumb Subway (This Sucks)